There are a lot of reasons that I am sick of having two jobs. Mainly though, I just miss my get up and go desire to do...thing, anything. I heart cooking and I heart movies, both of which I just don't have the desire to spend my precious stolen moments doing. As much as I love movies, I don't have the time to go because I am always working the weekend and then I say, well, I can just go after work sometime during the week that I am not working at Target but then the time comes and I think, " but that is 3 hours and I still have to go home and walk the dog, make something to eat, "settle" and then go to bed because I have to work the next day both jobs". So, movies become something I don't get to as often int he theater which makes me sad because I just love the whole experience of going to the movie. I love the atmosphere, the smells, etc. Sad face :(
But as I made a chilled avocado soup tonight I lament at not enjoying it. I LOVE to cook, and taking my time and turning out a spectacular meal. But to do that, to me, it has to be a craft, not a necessity. I got a new cookbook from my aunt and saw this soup that looked so good. But my umph to do it wained as i had to go to the store and get the stuff and then 3days later it was something I had to do instead of wanted to do. I got home from work and started it, again, just because I had the stuff and my mother kept asking about it. It called for chicken consume but I couldn't find any at the store, grazing a recipe on-line it looked like a souped up version of chicken broth so the cook in me thinks of substitution. As I make the soup, I try it, and it tastes like Avocado with chicken broth :(. I look at the recipe more in depth, and it takes a lot more then jazzing up chicken broth and I have no desire to do it. It would take 2 hours to reduce etc and I just give and and say, "nah".
6 months ago it wouldn't have phased me, I would have delved into the chore and relished in the outcome. So I reiterate, this job is doing taking the fun out of the things I find fun. Woe is me
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